Are you really this close?

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Are you really this close?

In the dim

You brush my elbow with your breast

and I think of the beach

and sandy elbows

I built a statue of myself at the breakfast table

Mechanically shoveling bites

Checking phone for signs of life

Your sweater wasn’t’ enough

as you mixed eggs and milk

Winter creeped up your stomach

Like a perve neighbor

who catches you unaware but doesn’t blush

with two granite eyes

I stared into that little box

Scrolling for salvation

As your hair brushed my cheek

And I thought of lines

Painted on the soccer pitch

And the smell of vinyl in grass

I noticed 

that you asked

If I noticed

and I said I had

But you didn’t believe me

And I tried to stare into your eyes

Tried to be so aware

Tried to push a memory

Of me noticing

Into your mind, 

but you wouldn’t have it

Instead you ate your eggs and wondered

Are you really this close?